T-Shirt UPDATE!

The LOYALTY IS VINTAGE shirts have been pushed back! The American Apparel cropped Tee is on back order! So, the product should be available for sale mid September! Thanks for your patience ! 

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Stray Cats.

"Stray Cats" is the name I call new & clingy acquaintances. 

For one, these are usually women. And it seems very natural for them to just cling to you socially, and pick up your jargon and/or style, thinking a slight imitation of you is impressive. 

They want to  impress you because they want to stay in your circle and good graces.

They don't have a lot of real friends, if any. They have a revolving door of people they associate with and they're often the "associate" that is cut off.

Stray Cats just want to be accepted. They want a home, and someone to like them back, hence the clingy-ness. 

They're only considered "cool" by SOME outsiders because most of who they are, and what they do, has been adapted from the homes (friends) they have been in and out of. 

Which also means, they have no real identity. And when their identity surfaces, which is a Stray Cat, they are, again, abandoned. 

Be careful of Stray Cats, their best interest is themselves not you. They're roaming around finding some new clique to be a part of, or some trend to exaggerate. They're not your real friend and they never will be. Stray Cats are usually always concealing some kind of lameness that got them abandoned in the first place. They want to use you for your hospitality. 

Friendship is not charity. It is earned. Leave the Stray Cats alone. 

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"Fuck it, let the Fish-burne..

..red or green pill, you live and you learn." -Jay-z

I think we have all heard about Laurence Fishburne's daughter, Montana, deciding to join the porn industry as an adult film star.  Using "star" very loosely, but ambitiously. And since her very public decision to do this, everyone from Kim Kardashian to her own Father has been blamed for her surprising choice of careers. She says she wants to do it because she sees how the "sex tape" worked for Kimmy K, and she wants the same kind of validation. Only, Kim did a sex tape with her boyfriend, which was intentionally leaked (in my opinion) and THEN sold to Vivid, while Montana is just deciding to do full fledged porn. And clearly Miss Kardashian was an isolated incident and should not be considered a typical outcome.

Here is my thing, Montana is of sound and mind. She is a legal adult, and doesn't to seem to have any learning disabilities. So why are we blaming other people for her decision to enter an industry that so many other young girls decide to do daily? Just because she is an actor's daughter doesn't grant her immunity from making harder choices that aren't particularly favored. I'm not saying she is doing the right or wrong thing, I'm just saying that she and only she should be held accountable for her adult choices. When I decided to strip, it wasn't because I was sexually abused or because my mom beat me, or because my father was mean to me. None of those things happened to me. I made that decision to dance at age 25, by myself, and because I wanted to.  I don't blame anyone for decisions that I make as a grown up. Same should go for Montana. I can understand young women being inspired by Kim, because she parlayed a not so great thing into a seemingly well built Kardashian Empire. But as a GROWN UP I understand that this is not at all typical, and Montana should understand this as well.

..With that being said, lets try and not look for someone to blame for Montana's choice to do porn. Instead, if you think she needs help, say that. Don't leap to the conclusion that her upbringing and other celebs had some kind of heavy hand in her submission to Brian Pumper's movies. Ultimately, she will decide if this will help her or not. My opinion is that she just wants some attention, and she has definitely got it. The fact that she is still using her last name in her adult films, shows that she wants people to recognize who her father is, hence, wanting attention. I happened to have seen a snippet of the porn, and I think it is hideous, and for such a pretty girl, the shots of her ass just did not compliment her at all. But, I supposed that doesn't matter, when her goal is to get people talking about her. After all, that is what we're doing.

In the end, circumstances don't always make who you are..not always. Fixing circumstances and blaming them, are two different things. Wrong, right, hard or easy, own up to it, as an adult.

"Blame is a lazy man's wages." -Danish Proverb

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"Practically all the relationships I know are based on a foundation of lies and mutually accepted delusion." 

-Samantha Jones

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Law 18.

Law 18

Do Not Build Fortresses to Protect Yourself – Isolation is Dangerous

The world is dangerous and enemies are everywhere – everyone has to protect themselves.  A fortress seems the safest. But isolation exposes you to more dangers than it protects you from – it cuts you off from valuable information, it makes you conspicuous and an easy target.  Better to circulate among people find allies, mingle.  You are shielded from your enemies by the crowd.

**Not to mention, walls built TOO high can block your blessings. How can someone find you or even l-ve you, if you're constantly hiding behind garish barriers that keep you from experiencing life? I myself prefer really cute, moderately high picket fences, equipped with snazzy hand mirrors so that enemies can see how truly ugly they are. 

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T-shirts are on sale! Yay!

Click here!

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Encore Post.

"Why do we judge the stripper and not the customer?"

I have asked myself this question often, since so often I was judged when I danced. And interestingly enough, my income was supplemented by the people who were judging me the most. Yep, the patronizing men that would make it rain in the club, were probably our harshest critics outside of the club. And it just seems odd these women who receive such criticism (strippers), seem to be making a lot of money off of these guys who so often look down on them. Just another acceptable double standard, right? For a long time, "society" has viewed strippers as women who have had to resort to dancing as a means of getting by, assuming that they are dumb and don't have the common knowledge, education, or job experience to gain "real" employment. Now, as for the men, who indirectly employ the dancers, they are always viewed as successful, or rich.  They're able to do whatever they want with their money, including but not limited to using the money as a charming mechanism for the ladies, and a source of power for the stripper. So, I guess it is their financial success that releases them from judgement when they become the "Strip Club Trick".  

The Strip industry houses all sorts of women. Some are really smart ladies that have other things going on, like school, second jobs, kids, etc. Others are purely fueled by the fast money and freedom to make your own schedule and place of employment.These days, stripping has become more of an  option that some women willingly choose, rather than a shameful choice we are forced to make. Being pretty AND  smart comes in handy when entertaining rich men, especially in the strip club. Some of the time, dancers can be the smarter of the two, and consider it being a craft to be able to get paid to look gorgeous and dance in one spot, nude, giggling, harmlessly flirting away while the songs keep going and the money keeps flowing. I don't know how much of an art form hustling is, but it is only the stupid strippers that make it hard for the business to stay legit. 

So what makes the customer better than the stripper?

Of course, there are tons of exotic dancers who fit that stereotype of a dumb, promiscuous drug addict prostitute.  No matter how opposite you are to that, the stigma and money are a package deal.  If strippers have such a bad reputation, how come their employers (customers)  aren't equally as damned? With stripper and customer, one can not exist without the other, and the money is the number one enabler. Personally I try not to judge anyone that is generous enough to spend an evening in the club buying drinks and dances all night, especially in this economy. So, it is only fitting that the women who choose to dance for a living get that same respect. If a guy wants to give me money to dance for him nude, he is getting what he wants (the dance), and I'm getting what i want (the money). That fair exchange makes for two satisfied people. And in this case, money clearly supersedes that satisfaction. Because in the end, it is money that distinguishes who is getting judged, and who is not.

Just something to think about..

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